Nov 13, 2008

Had to share...

My mom just e-mailed this to me and I thought it was just too funny!  

Jack wakes up with a huge hangover after attending his company's party.
Jack is not normally a drinker, but the drinks didn't taste like
alcohol at all. He doesn't even remember how he got home from the party.

As bad as he is feeling, he wonders if he did something wrong.
Jack forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he
sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side
table. And, next to them, there is a single red rose!! Jack sits up and sees
his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed.
He looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order,
spotlessly clean. So is the rest of the house.

He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring
back at him in the bathroom mirror. Then he notices a note hanging
on the corner of the mirror written in red with little hearts on it
and a kiss mark from his wife in lipstick:

'Honey, breakfast is on the stove. I left early to get groceries to make you your favorite dinner

I love you, darling!
Love, Jillian'

He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is hot breakfast,
steaming hot coffee and the morning newspaper. His 16 year old son is
also at the table, eating.

Jack asks, 'Son, what happened last night?'

'Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk and out of your mind. You fell
over the coffee table and broke it, and then you puked in the hallway,
and got that black eye when you ran into the door.' Confused, he asks
his son, 'So, why is everything in such perfect order and so clean?
I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me??'

His son replies,
'Oh THAT... Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take
your pants off, you screamed, 'Leave me alone bitch, I'm married!!'

Broken Coffee Table $239.99
Hot Breakfast $4.20
Two Aspirins $.38
Saying the right thing, at the right time: